[ The bitterness catches him by surprise when he still has to nudge Fenris into speaking his mind, into admitting he has a mind to speak at all, and a part of him is intrigued with how brutal and blunt he is with his words and honestly? Rafe prefers it that way. He doesn't want to hear about better luck next time, about taking things easier— That's coddling crap which doesn't do anything but lower expectation, normalize a failure, and prepare for more of the same next time around.
He goes silent, jaw working as he grips the counter on either side of him as the truth of Fenris's words sinks in and settles in the pit of his stomach. There's nothing that Fenris has said of his world that makes Rafe envy him but the experience he's since walked away with because of it... It's a valuable commodity, priceless, and Rafe doesn't have the luxury of accruing it in bits and pieces here. When he speaks again it's less of self-recrimination, more cold hard facts. ]
Landing here with that kind of handicap is all the more reason to get my shit together. It seems like everybody else here— I mean it, everyone I've spoken to —comes from somewhere where this is... If it's not the norm, then it's sure as hell not the weirdest thing they've ever heard of. I'm not saying kind of experience is great but it's still an edge I don't have.
[ Shaking his head, he exhales sharply through his nose out of habit. ]
I need to get better. [ An accusing eyebrow raises at Fenris as he glances up from the hole he'd been staring into the linoleum. ] At the very least so that you can find a use for your time and energy that isn't just picking my ass up when I fall all over myself.
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winterfish
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Date: 2020-08-21 02:27 am (UTC)He goes silent, jaw working as he grips the counter on either side of him as the truth of Fenris's words sinks in and settles in the pit of his stomach. There's nothing that Fenris has said of his world that makes Rafe envy him but the experience he's since walked away with because of it... It's a valuable commodity, priceless, and Rafe doesn't have the luxury of accruing it in bits and pieces here. When he speaks again it's less of self-recrimination, more cold hard facts. ]
Landing here with that kind of handicap is all the more reason to get my shit together. It seems like everybody else here— I mean it, everyone I've spoken to —comes from somewhere where this is... If it's not the norm, then it's sure as hell not the weirdest thing they've ever heard of. I'm not saying kind of experience is great but it's still an edge I don't have.
[ Shaking his head, he exhales sharply through his nose out of habit. ]
I need to get better. [ An accusing eyebrow raises at Fenris as he glances up from the hole he'd been staring into the linoleum. ] At the very least so that you can find a use for your time and energy that isn't just picking my ass up when I fall all over myself.